Sleep sucks

Not really...I love sleep.  I can sleep with the best of 'em.  12 hours, no problem.  Unless, of course, I've got insomnia or a 4 year old who doesn't seem to think sleep is a good thing.  I've got a bit of both right now.  If I didn't have said 4 year old, and it was just insomnia, then I could nap.  But I do and it's not just insomnia.

Keeghan slept like a champ in China.  Once home, notsomuch.  Jet lag coming back SUCKED.  I went cold turkey and got back on US time pretty quick.  The then 17 month old, didn't.  Once we were over insomnia we still weren't so good about sleeping.  Understandable.  We gave it time.  I comforted her.  We bonded.  Sleep got somewhat better.

BUT almost 3 years later we still can't count on Keeghan sleeping through the night more than once a week.  And by sleeping through the night I mean 8pm-6am if we're lucky.  Naps are done.  Once in a while we take a nap but then bedtime is more of a nightmare.  Nighttime, is already a nightmare.  There are nights I've found Keeghan playing Nintendo at 3am.  Last night she was hanging out with one of the dogs at 4am.  The night before we were running the halls at 2:30am.  We had a sticker thing going...stay in your bed all night, get a sticker.  Sweet right?  Sure, for the first few weeks...then it's just old and boring and why stay in bed?  The kid is tired, she's fallen DEAD asleep in the car two days this week.  Her behaviour screams tired.  Her little body/brain however, not so interested in giving in to sleep. 

We're at the scared of monsters stage.  We're asking TONS of questions about birthparents and China.  School starts next week.  There was the 1 night a month ago someone else put her to bed...the first time since she came home.  That's alot and I think it's all adding up to lack of sleep...for both of us.  If I could just have an epic meltdown whenever/wherever I want, that might be ok.  But given I'm 4 with a 0 and not just 4, I can't.  So I'm trudging through while little miss just 4 can meltdown at will.  Trying to give my little princess some extra love and consistency and motivation.  I'll get to sleep again sometime.  She will never be 4 again.