It seems summer is flying by us! Keeghan's 3rd birthday is next week which means it's been 2 years since we first saw her beautiful face. She's grown and changed so much and continues to amaze us. Her language is coming along but there are plenty of words that just don't come out even close to right so we continue with speech therapy and will be transitioning Keeghan to pre-school this fall. I'm not so sure that transition will go terribly well as Keeghan is still pretty clingy with me and will often give me a hard time about leaving for work and I really don't get much of a chance to leave her for anything else unless she's asleep. I'm thinking I need to re-visit some reading on anxious attachment and work on that. We have been talking alot about Keeghan going to school and that MaMa will go to work while Keeghan is at school and she says "ya!" and is excited to go "in my classroom and do learning" but I'm not so sure that enthusiasm will continue once she realizes that I'm really NOT staying. I'm going to put together a photo album of pictures to try and help with the transition...Keeghan getting ready for school, Keeghan getting dropped off at school giving MaMa a hug, MaMa waving bye bye, Keeghan in her classroom, MaMa coming back to pick Keeghan up, and Keeghan going back home. Hopefully the visual will help. She is understanding that MaMa comes back (and BaBa too) and will tell us that but it doesn't always mean MaMa gets to leave without tears or clinging. The teacher she will be with is fabulous and I know we'll make this transition eventually but it doesn't make it any easier for me to think about.
Speaking of transitions...Devon has been away this week at a lacrosse camp. This is the first time he's been away from us this long and it seems to be going well (thankfully he's sent me text messages) but I'm ready for him to come home. I'm interested to see how he feels about having been away for a few nights with strangers. Hopefully he's learned a few things and had some fun. I'm looking forward to hearing all about it.
And Kennedy, she gets to do a soccer camp in a few weeks that is being run by a major league soccer team...very cool. She's really looking forward to it and is really ready for soccer season to get going.
Carson did a gymnastics camp last week. She's been BEGGING us for years to let her do gymnastics. I've been saying "NO" for fear of the expense but we finally gave in and said, fine...one week of camp. I went to pick her up day one and they want to put her on a team. One of the coaches saw her flipping around and asked where she trained and when they realized she was mostly self taught (I have enough experience that I've helped a bit) they knew she'd learn quick. We explored the costs (UN-DOABLE) and settled on an option that lets Carson spend 2 hours a week in the gym with girls at her level and will not bankrupt us.
So far, so good for summer. Looking forward to some more time at the beach, a trip to the zoo, and whatever else this warm weather brings!
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
The last month in iPhone pics
Keeghan has master the playground.
Kennedy's team took 2nd place at our state open cup a few weeks ago.
Carson graduated elementary school.
Kennedy got my iPhone for her birthday...and I get the new iPhone : )
Keeghan enjoyed alot of fun at the end of the school year.Saturday, June 12, 2010
Summer is upon us
Almost. The big kids have another week (and a half day) of school and we've got a few more lose ends to wrap up the end of the year but I'm looking forward to some lazy days and beach trips and maybe hitting the zoo this summer. Devon is finishing up his freshman year of high school. Kennedy will head in to her last year of middle school (8th grade) in the fall while Carson will be starting middle school (6th grade). It's hard to believe they are all out of elementary school.
My years there, however, are not done as Keeghan will be starting pre-school at our elementary school in the fall. She is enrolled in a program that meets for about 3 hours 3 or 4 mornings a week. It's a classroom that consists of both identified and typically developing kids and we aren't totally sure yet if Keeghan will go as a "typical" child and be given speech and OT services that way or if she will end up identified to receive the services she needs. We did some testing last Friday and have a few more meetings and some more testing to do before we'll have all the answers. We've been in Keeghan's classroom twice now and Keeghan is very excited to go to school. I'm not so sure that enthusiasm will continue once she realizes I will not be attending school with her. I'm sure we'll figure it out and she will have a ton of fun once she's settled in. We've come a long way in the 18 months Keeghan's been home and I'm very proud of my little princess. She's an amazing little girl.
Her sisters and brother are pretty amazing too. Devon had a great first season playing lacrosse for his high school team. He has never really played before but held his own and played fairly well over the course of the season. As I said in a previous post he has earned a place at a camp this summer and is really looking forward to that. He's also hoping to play in a summer league and will then play soccer in the fall and then lacrosse winter and spring.
Kennedy has had a great spring soccer season earning herself a spot as a captain of her team. She's scored a few hard earned goals which is nice to see. One was in a tournament where a boy on the opposing team was giving Kennedy a very hard time (he called her some choice names and went as far as saying that girls couldn't play soccer). Kennedy proceeded to put a shot into their net showing this boy he was very wrong and girls most certainly can play soccer...even with boys and succeed. I'm proud of how Kennedy handled herself and of how her team mates supported her. They're a great bunch of kids.
Carson had a busy spring with soccer, school track, a school talent show, band and chorus. She was constantly on the go but kept up with all of it and made sure her school work was done well and she still had time for her baby sister : )
Keeghan continues to grow and amaze us. She is not yet 3 but weighs a solid 40lbs and is a good 41" tall...monster baby! She's getting better about staying without me when I work or run an errand and she continues to enjoy going to the gym with me. She loves being outside swinging, in the pool, on her bike, on the trampoline or at the park but she HATES bugs. The sight of a bug (or a piece of dirt that looks a bit bug like) throws her into a panic and she will scream if it's too close. There have been a few issues with bugs in the car where we have had to stop driving to squish the bug before she would even start to calm down. I'm hoping this fear will get better over the summer because it's a bit much. Despite often being dragged around to soccer or lacrosse or some school event Keeghan has kept a smile on her face (most of the time) and tries to go with the flow. It's easy to forget she hasn't been here forever.
My years there, however, are not done as Keeghan will be starting pre-school at our elementary school in the fall. She is enrolled in a program that meets for about 3 hours 3 or 4 mornings a week. It's a classroom that consists of both identified and typically developing kids and we aren't totally sure yet if Keeghan will go as a "typical" child and be given speech and OT services that way or if she will end up identified to receive the services she needs. We did some testing last Friday and have a few more meetings and some more testing to do before we'll have all the answers. We've been in Keeghan's classroom twice now and Keeghan is very excited to go to school. I'm not so sure that enthusiasm will continue once she realizes I will not be attending school with her. I'm sure we'll figure it out and she will have a ton of fun once she's settled in. We've come a long way in the 18 months Keeghan's been home and I'm very proud of my little princess. She's an amazing little girl.
Her sisters and brother are pretty amazing too. Devon had a great first season playing lacrosse for his high school team. He has never really played before but held his own and played fairly well over the course of the season. As I said in a previous post he has earned a place at a camp this summer and is really looking forward to that. He's also hoping to play in a summer league and will then play soccer in the fall and then lacrosse winter and spring.
Kennedy has had a great spring soccer season earning herself a spot as a captain of her team. She's scored a few hard earned goals which is nice to see. One was in a tournament where a boy on the opposing team was giving Kennedy a very hard time (he called her some choice names and went as far as saying that girls couldn't play soccer). Kennedy proceeded to put a shot into their net showing this boy he was very wrong and girls most certainly can play soccer...even with boys and succeed. I'm proud of how Kennedy handled herself and of how her team mates supported her. They're a great bunch of kids.
Carson had a busy spring with soccer, school track, a school talent show, band and chorus. She was constantly on the go but kept up with all of it and made sure her school work was done well and she still had time for her baby sister : )
Keeghan continues to grow and amaze us. She is not yet 3 but weighs a solid 40lbs and is a good 41" tall...monster baby! She's getting better about staying without me when I work or run an errand and she continues to enjoy going to the gym with me. She loves being outside swinging, in the pool, on her bike, on the trampoline or at the park but she HATES bugs. The sight of a bug (or a piece of dirt that looks a bit bug like) throws her into a panic and she will scream if it's too close. There have been a few issues with bugs in the car where we have had to stop driving to squish the bug before she would even start to calm down. I'm hoping this fear will get better over the summer because it's a bit much. Despite often being dragged around to soccer or lacrosse or some school event Keeghan has kept a smile on her face (most of the time) and tries to go with the flow. It's easy to forget she hasn't been here forever.
Monday, May 24, 2010
Because I'm a proud Mom...
I have to share that Devon won a scholarship to a lacrosse camp from US Lacrosse. It is, of course, a sleep away camp which is, of course, causing me huge anxiety but I guess I'll have to let him grow up sometime and now is as good as any. Before this spring Devon has played exactly one week of lacrosse. A half day city camp a few summers ago. He was psyched to play this spring at school and has done fairly well for a kid who barely knew the game. He's loving it so even though I'm anxiety ridden over him being at sleep away camp, I'm also excited for him.
AND Kennedy was named co-captain of her (boys) soccer team. She is one of two girls on the team and has worked very hard to have a leadership role. She plays a mean game of soccer...even against boys. She's very proud of herself and so am I.
AND Kennedy was named co-captain of her (boys) soccer team. She is one of two girls on the team and has worked very hard to have a leadership role. She plays a mean game of soccer...even against boys. She's very proud of herself and so am I.
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
More Truths
There's still a lot of uproar about the adoptive mother who returned her son recently. It's lead to lots of talk about how well prepared parents are when adopting. Who's responsible for making sure they are ready to parent a child who may have attachment problems, sensory issues, and so much more. As a parent of both bio and adopted children I've thought a lot about this.
Parenting is really a crap shoot. Bio/adopted/foster/however your kids come to you there is no guarantee of what you'll get. There's a bit of control in the bio set...you eat well, take vitamins, have pre-natal care sure. That, however, doesn't guarantee a healthy child. Heck you can get through all of that to end up with a child with cancer or an injury that causes challenges. Same with adoption. You make choices in the process but those are no guarantee either. I think in making the choice to be a parent you need to be prepared for whatever might come your way. That said, I don't understand the attitude that a lot of people have about adoptive parents being somehow different, special. The word noble was used to me once. Every parent faces challenges and I am no different than the rest. I am in no way special for adopting. We wanted to grow our family and that's what we did.
Thursday, April 15, 2010
We Are The Truth...
In response to the horrific act of an adoptive mother putting her 7 year old son on a plane back to his birth country the Joint Council on International Children's Services has asked people to today, blog about adoption success stories...I know we've only had Keeghan home 16 months, but so far so good : )
Our journey to adoption could probably be seen as having begun 11ish years ago. I was pregnant with our third child and we were pretty sure that would be it, our family would be complete. We had been lucky in conceiving easily so we opted for "permanent" birth control. Carson was born in April of 1999 when Devon had JUST turned 4 and Kennedy was 21 months old. My days were filled with diapers, feeding, carseats, Sesame Street, and all things baby and toddlers. Slowly the kids were growing up. Devon went off to a full day kindergarten. Kennedy was in pre-school and then off to kindergarten. Carson went off to pre-school...and I longed for another baby. Doug wasn't convinced that another baby was such a good idea. We still had our hands pretty full and plenty of things to work on. Until August 1st 2007.
We were literally headed out the door to soccer practice (Doug's team so he HAD to be there) when I could tell something was up. I asked what was wrong and Doug closed the door to our bedroom...UH OH! I sat down and Doug proceeded to say that he had been thinking alot and if I still thought another child was a good idea he thought we should adopt from China. He handed me an application from our agency. I was stunned SILENT. And off we went to practice. Thankfully, Doug had taken the next day off from work to hit the beach as a family. We talked alot that day...about having another bio child, about adoption (domestic and international), about everything. I did some research of my own and we decided we'd spend our 15th wedding anniversary (8/8) at an info session with our agency. We left there both knowing we were going to adopt. I made a phone call on our way to dinner to some friends who had used this agency and been home with their daughter a few years to ask a few questions and I guess share our news. The next morning we shared with our kids (over donuts of course) that they would probably be getting a new sister. We sent off our application which was approved and moved forward to finish a homestudy and all the other paperwork that needed to be done to adopt. Our big kids were asked to keep this all quiet until we were done with paperwork and homestudy approved. So, they waited a good 2 months before getting to share with friends their exciting news. It was hard for all of us. Our dossier went off to China in December of 2007...and we waited.
After much discussion, come February of 2008 we decided there were several special needs we were willing to take on. We spoke with our agency and our social worker and made a list...and waited some more. We figured we still have a good year or so to wait. We hoped that we would all travel to China. But, that all changed in July of 2008 when I opened an e-mail with a list of kids available for adoption. I questioned the files of 3 of those kids and within a few days saw my daughter's face for the first time. She was about to turn 1, was diagnosed with congenital lymphedema, and I was in love. We had research to do. Lymphedema is something far more common in woman who've had breast cancer than a 1 year old and not too many medical professionals knew what to do with a child with this condition. We made phone calls, did internet research, joined yahoo groups, and took a leap of faith the day after our daughter turned one. We locked her file and wrote a letter of intent to the Chinese government sent off a few more documents and waited for the approval that NianShuang could be ours. 2 weeks later we received that approval and shouted from the rooftops that we had a new daughter.
I travelled alone to Hunan China in December of 2008 to bring Keeghan home. She was handed to me the morning of 12/8, screaming. She kicked me, pushed me and cried some more. I tried bribing her with food (she already had 2 cookies in her hands). We left the office with her still very unhappy to be with me. At 16 months old she knew that I was a stranger and was not thrilled with the idea of going anywhere with me. The crying lasted a few hours and a few hours the next day but Keeghan decided since I was the one with the food and toys she'd deal. We worked hard on bonding over the next week. I wore Keeghan alot (no easy task with a 28lb child) and carried her and hand fed her and used a bottle. I worked to ensure her that I would take care of her. We returned home on 12/17 to meet our family at the airport. The big kids were thrilled to finally meet their new sister and we were all thrilled that I was home.
The past 16 months have been work. There are nights we've been up for 3, 4, or 5 hours at a time. There have been days where Keeghan will not let me put her down. She, to this day, does NOT like me to leave her. She does love swinging, blowing bubbles, dancing, spinning on her sit n spin, reading books and playing with her brother and sisters. She's an amazing little girl who has brought alot to our lives.
Adoption or biology, parenting is not an easy task but it is oh so rewarding. Watching your children grown, learn, love, and succeed makes every sleepless night and tough day worth it. I know we've had a relatively easy transition. I know we've been lucky. But I also did my homework and reached out for help if I needed it. I know we still have work to do and I know we'll have some VERY tough questions to answer in the future. But that's all ok because we wanted to grow our family and Keeghan was a PERFECT addition.
Our journey to adoption could probably be seen as having begun 11ish years ago. I was pregnant with our third child and we were pretty sure that would be it, our family would be complete. We had been lucky in conceiving easily so we opted for "permanent" birth control. Carson was born in April of 1999 when Devon had JUST turned 4 and Kennedy was 21 months old. My days were filled with diapers, feeding, carseats, Sesame Street, and all things baby and toddlers. Slowly the kids were growing up. Devon went off to a full day kindergarten. Kennedy was in pre-school and then off to kindergarten. Carson went off to pre-school...and I longed for another baby. Doug wasn't convinced that another baby was such a good idea. We still had our hands pretty full and plenty of things to work on. Until August 1st 2007.
We were literally headed out the door to soccer practice (Doug's team so he HAD to be there) when I could tell something was up. I asked what was wrong and Doug closed the door to our bedroom...UH OH! I sat down and Doug proceeded to say that he had been thinking alot and if I still thought another child was a good idea he thought we should adopt from China. He handed me an application from our agency. I was stunned SILENT. And off we went to practice. Thankfully, Doug had taken the next day off from work to hit the beach as a family. We talked alot that day...about having another bio child, about adoption (domestic and international), about everything. I did some research of my own and we decided we'd spend our 15th wedding anniversary (8/8) at an info session with our agency. We left there both knowing we were going to adopt. I made a phone call on our way to dinner to some friends who had used this agency and been home with their daughter a few years to ask a few questions and I guess share our news. The next morning we shared with our kids (over donuts of course) that they would probably be getting a new sister. We sent off our application which was approved and moved forward to finish a homestudy and all the other paperwork that needed to be done to adopt. Our big kids were asked to keep this all quiet until we were done with paperwork and homestudy approved. So, they waited a good 2 months before getting to share with friends their exciting news. It was hard for all of us. Our dossier went off to China in December of 2007...and we waited.
After much discussion, come February of 2008 we decided there were several special needs we were willing to take on. We spoke with our agency and our social worker and made a list...and waited some more. We figured we still have a good year or so to wait. We hoped that we would all travel to China. But, that all changed in July of 2008 when I opened an e-mail with a list of kids available for adoption. I questioned the files of 3 of those kids and within a few days saw my daughter's face for the first time. She was about to turn 1, was diagnosed with congenital lymphedema, and I was in love. We had research to do. Lymphedema is something far more common in woman who've had breast cancer than a 1 year old and not too many medical professionals knew what to do with a child with this condition. We made phone calls, did internet research, joined yahoo groups, and took a leap of faith the day after our daughter turned one. We locked her file and wrote a letter of intent to the Chinese government sent off a few more documents and waited for the approval that NianShuang could be ours. 2 weeks later we received that approval and shouted from the rooftops that we had a new daughter.
I travelled alone to Hunan China in December of 2008 to bring Keeghan home. She was handed to me the morning of 12/8, screaming. She kicked me, pushed me and cried some more. I tried bribing her with food (she already had 2 cookies in her hands). We left the office with her still very unhappy to be with me. At 16 months old she knew that I was a stranger and was not thrilled with the idea of going anywhere with me. The crying lasted a few hours and a few hours the next day but Keeghan decided since I was the one with the food and toys she'd deal. We worked hard on bonding over the next week. I wore Keeghan alot (no easy task with a 28lb child) and carried her and hand fed her and used a bottle. I worked to ensure her that I would take care of her. We returned home on 12/17 to meet our family at the airport. The big kids were thrilled to finally meet their new sister and we were all thrilled that I was home.
The past 16 months have been work. There are nights we've been up for 3, 4, or 5 hours at a time. There have been days where Keeghan will not let me put her down. She, to this day, does NOT like me to leave her. She does love swinging, blowing bubbles, dancing, spinning on her sit n spin, reading books and playing with her brother and sisters. She's an amazing little girl who has brought alot to our lives.
Adoption or biology, parenting is not an easy task but it is oh so rewarding. Watching your children grown, learn, love, and succeed makes every sleepless night and tough day worth it. I know we've had a relatively easy transition. I know we've been lucky. But I also did my homework and reached out for help if I needed it. I know we still have work to do and I know we'll have some VERY tough questions to answer in the future. But that's all ok because we wanted to grow our family and Keeghan was a PERFECT addition.
Thursday, April 8, 2010
After 16 months...
Keeghan is officially a United States Citizen. We had an "interview" appointment today at the local USCIS (United States Citizenship and Immigration Services) office where we assured them our paperwork was still right, signed a few things, turned over Keeghan's green card, and took an oath renouncing her citizenship from China. About 20 minutes in the office and voila, she's a citizen. And we didn't even manage to wreck the poor man's office though Keeghan had a great time with a stamp and stapler. I took a few pictures with my phone that I posted on Facebook and I'll try and remember to get them here.
We also celebrated Carson's 11th birthday today...so we went out for dinner and ice cream. Lots to celebrate today!
We also celebrated Carson's 11th birthday today...so we went out for dinner and ice cream. Lots to celebrate today!
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